OMG, WTF, etc.

I made law review. seriously, law review. omg, wtf. after an entire year of thinking i was going to fail out of law school. words cannot describe.

the lesson to all of you soon-to-be 1Ls: there are times you will feel like you'll fail out or that nothing can be worse. you'll see the darkest days of your young life. but, in the end, anything is possible.

i just hope they didn't make a mistake. and that i don't screw up. i'm *absolutely* sure that once people see my name on the list they'll be just as confused as i am. yes, i was the one with all the stupid comments in con law. oh well. i just hope i can make friends.

wow. just wow. hope it's all it's supposed to be.

halfway through!

So I have two down, two to go. I think the two exams were pretty fair. That doesn't mean I did well on them. On Civ Pro I think I knew what I was talking about and that's the class that I know the best. So I think the best I can hope for is a B+ (knowing my section). But yesterday I had Crim. CRIM. Oh Crim. After the test I was so happy, but only because I knew I never had to be in that class again or deal with my conceited Prof's ugly mug. I thought the actual law was interesting. The problem was he never taught it. I basically spent every waking hour from Thanksgiving until yesterday on crim. By the end I thought I at least had a good working knowledge of the little that we did discuss in class. Then the exam happened. I was the hardest exam I've ever taken in my life. I have no idea what I wrote. So now it's just a race to the bottom. I figure if I can do better than at least 10 people in my section I can get a B. At best. Because that exam was HORRIBLE. I'm going to try and not think about it because I've made peace with getting a 3.0 gpa, but I'm just worried I'll be one of the few Cs this semester. I guess this puts a lot of pressure on me for next semester to bring my gpa up to a 3.2/3.3, 'cause it seems like that's the gpa where you can actually get a few offers.

Oh well. I just hope the firms I work for during 1L summer even ask me back after getting my first year grades!! I sent out four letters and got three interviews...so I'm hoping for a job before January. le sigh.

BUT (and I need to say this so I can come back and read it when I get my grades back in January) I'm still VERY VERY glad I've gone to law school. I've learned so much and as long as I pass I'm getting closer to my goal of becoming a lawyer. I won't come out with accolades galore, but at least I'll finally have my J.D. and I'll be able to provide for my family. Most of all, I'm glad I matriculated at my school because although the curve is so tight (because of our small sections) the congeniality of my class really makes up for it.

Ok, now it's time for Ks. Good luck everyone!

Twas the night before finals...

So it's finally here. Exams start tomorrow. The most important exams of my life. ha. I'm almost kidding. I think I'm in a good place. I mean, I don't think i'm going to get any stellar grades but I think I have a good attitude. I didn't spend my last day frantically studying in the library. I've talked through a couple of the main themes of the class with friends, but mainly I just hit the gym and am going to cook dinner with the boyfriend before turning in early. I feel like I know as much as I could possibly know by this point so any studying today would only serve to confuse me. Half of my section swarmed my TA today and I just knew I couldn't bear to be a part of it -- I know it would just make me feel worse. So, I'm going into my first law school final at least feelings somewhat confident. It may be unjustified confidence, but I think that it'll let me focus on the exam.

But! After noon tomorrow I'll have 2.5 days to study for Crim (a.k.a. the bane of my existence). I know absolutely NOTHING about crim. The only things I know are the things I taught to myself using the E&E. Sadly my Prof is old-school socratic and I was absolutely terrified of him. Last year he gave several Cs (more than normal at this school, I guess). So i'm hoping that means I can at least pull off a B- in that class. Normally that grade would terrify me, but at this point it's just damage control. Sigh. but that's only after tomorrow. For now I need to focus on the present exam and just do my best. I've never studied so hard in my life, and I know that I'm not going to be the best in my section. But, I think I'll be good enough to at least get the median in some classes. And I've made peace with that.

Anyway, good luck to you all who are starting (or who have already started) final exams. Only two more weeks left for me!

P.S. Even Cs get JDs. yay!

Beginning of the End.

So I just turned in my final legal memo of the semester. I guess I should check that off my list of law school milestones. I don't think it has fully sunken in yet, but I will be shortly taking the most important final exams of my life. Yeah, not too much pressure.

So I'll be staying in New City for Thanksgiving. No relatives here and no where to go, but I'm not really that sad about it. I promised myself I'd take a least one full day off to rest and I think I'll stick to it. Here's the sick thing: I found out the library is closed on Thursday and Friday and I was actually at a loss. "But where will I go?" I thought to myself. WTF. WTF. WTF.

Law school is really getting to me. I hope I'll be an interesting person when I go home in a month. The countdown has begun...

Wow.

So I got my first legal writing memo back today. I was expecting the lowest grade possible (it's graded out of 5), but it turns out I did above the median!! By several points. That's incredible!! I have no idea what the highest score was, but I did much better than I thought. By a lot. I guess this shows how completely arbitrary the whole thing is especially since the comments on the paper were very bad. Watch: now I'll get a horrible grade on the next one. And it's due in oh, a couple of days. It's completely ridiculous. Oh AND a take-home midterm that we just found out about TODAY is due on Monday. I'm not going to get out at all this weekend. :( It's not even a weekend - it's just a normal work day but without classes. Boo.

That said, fall has definitely hit New City. Yay! I absolultely love fall. I don't remember it being this blustery in my last city though. I wonder if that's a New City thing. I hope not because the wind child is going to be ridiculous come winter. Speaking of which, there are only a 6 weeks or so left of class!! that's so scary!!! but that's also good in that the first semester is almost over. i can't wait! I was aiming for an A minus average; now I'm just hoping for straight Bs. Is that enough to get an OK job? I just hope it's all worth it in the end.

Can Law School Induce Bi-Polar disorder?

Cause I think I need some Lithium real fast. As is quite frequently the case, when things seem to be going well life takes a big, sweet turn for the worse. Thursdays and Fridays (well, until 2pm on Fridays) are my most UNCTUOUS days because I have Crim. Law with Professor Scary. I just don't understand anything in that class, no matter how hard I try. Everyone says I shouldn't worry, because our Prof talks about theory way more than we need to be responsible for on the exam, but I really think my mind just doesn't work near anything crim related. My other classes are 234233423 times easier than crim. I already know crim will be my worst grade and have announced it to the class. Some of my sectionmates laughed, but I could see in many of their eyes that they think the same. I guess it makes me less curmudgeonly and more endearing since I'm not a threat. In FACT I'm doing them a service by bringing down the curve. yay.

So I was flying high on Wednesday b/c I felt really productive in 3 class, but man - I don't think I've ever felt so low as I did after class today. Talking to the TA made me feel slightly better and I feel so lucky that he's so willing to help. However, it won't be helpful unless I know what questions to even ASK him but I'm still at the i-don't-know-what-i-don't-know stage. I hate that I'm using outside commercial aides for this class simply b/c I feel like I need to teach it to myself, but I don't know what else to do. I just don't even know how to approach it.

Can I also say that I HATE that all I talk about is law school? I used to be an interesting person, I swear.

On Citations.

So my legal writing Prof. assigned us an online citations exercise that had 45 problems we needed to figure out. Everyone in my section was complaining about how long and tedious it was, so I decided to hunker down and attempt at least the first couple problems today. I LOVED IT! Not sure if that's a normal reaction, but my classmates made me think it would be hell on earth. I can honestly say these exercises were the most enjoyable part of law school so far. I got to FINALLY familiarize myself with the citations manual and realized that citations aren't the worst thing in the world. I know I don't have a chance in hell in making one of the top journals next year, but if I did I think I'd at least partially enjoy the citations portion of the work. I can't believe I worked on this for 5 hours straight! yay!!

In other news: midterms are coming up. I'm actually excited about this because I'll actually see what my Profs are expecting (esp. good for Torts Prof since he's a visiting Prof this year). I'm just starting to outline Torts and Civ Pro (hoping Ks will happen this weekend). No midterm in Crim, though! That's the class I feel the most lost in (since the Prof LOVES theory), but 2Ls and 3Ls keep saying I should just study the black letter law. This makes sense to me. Just mark-up the MPC really well and contrast it with whatever made-up statutes he gives me on the exam.

Anyway, I'm still liking the idea of law school and I'm so happy that I'm actually learning. Now I just have to see if I can actually apply all of this info (and if I've actually picked up all the minute details). The sad thing is, I know that no matter how much I study there will always be people who know the material better. I guess I just have to learn not to worry about this and embrace whatever I get. I hate that these classes are curved against only my section-mates! I guess that's the curse of having a small section.

Ok, more legal writing stuff to do (open memo has officially begun and this is the stuff I really want to learn well).

Good luck, everyone!