Wherein I go crazy.

Now, I've read all the blogs and books and have told myself that law school would be a whole new monster; that I'd have to approach it in a new way and that I needed to be patient with myself. This still applies now, but I've encountered a new problem that I've NEVER experienced before: I'm completely terrified of speaking in class. I mean, I know many people encounter this type of anxiety but I was literally SHAKING during class. I was really worried that the row of people behind me could actually see me shaking so I pulled my hoodie closer. So I keep telling myself that I'm paying the big bucks to learn a new style of thinking and that isn't not gonna come easy. Supposedly, the only way to learn this new style is to raise that hand and participate. I'm really trying to work on it, but I'm still not sure what I'm supposed to be doing in class. It's difficult to articulate, as I know that you're supposed to brief the cases and be able to discuss them in class (which I do - I've worked very hard on learning how to brief), but other than being able to recite the details of the case, I'm completely baffled by how many comments my classmates have. I mean, I sit in class and I listen to them (and most are good points), but my mind is just blank. I keep wondering what I'm "supposed" to be thinking or what a good student would do.

I guess this is just a natural part of starting law school, but it seems like all my other classmates have absolutely no qualms about raising their hands. They need a manual for this! On the other hand, I'm not sure why I'm finding this so difficult. It's just read, brief, and answer the prof's questions in class, right?

Anywho, seems like I'm right where I'm supposed to be at this stage and I'm gonna take all the advice at face value and truly hope that "I"ll get the hang of it." The funny thing is, this current two week class is completely non-graded and exists purely to help prep us for the real deal in 1.5 weeks. If I understand the cases, why do I feel so disoriented?

Mission for tomorrow: actually raise my hand and say something. Even if it is just the procedural posture.

Sorry, that's the end of that rant! Hope all you other 1Ls are doing ok...

Holy Shit.

Tomorrow is my first law class ever. asdj;flaskdjf;lskjdf Granted it's only a pre-orientation class, but still, I'll be meeting about 30 of my future classmates and am responsible for doing actual homework. I can't believe it's finally here. I hope I can sleep tonight cause i'm freaking out.